Bachelorette parties can be one of the most anticipated parts of wedding planning. Whether it’s a weekend in Nashville or a wine tour close to home, it’s a chance for the bride and her closest friends to celebrate in style. But what happens when one of your bridesmaids quietly admits she can’t afford to join in?

It can feel awkward, even disappointing. But it’s also a very real situation many brides and bridal parties face—especially with travel and celebration costs on the rise. Here’s how to handle it with empathy and grace while keeping your friendship (and your bachelorette vibes) intact.

What to Do If Your Bridesmaid Can’t Afford Your Bachelorette Party

Start with a Conversation

If a bridesmaid shares that she’s struggling with the cost, the first and most important thing you can do is listen. This isn’t a moment for guilt, pressure, or frustration. Thank her for being honest, and assure her that your friendship means more than any party.

It’s also okay to ask questions if you’re unsure what aspect is too expensive—whether it’s flights, lodging, activities, or meals. Understanding the specifics can help you figure out the best path forward.

Revisit the Budget with the Group

Once you’re aware of a financial concern, check in with your maid of honor or whoever’s helping plan the bachelorette party. Is there any room to simplify the itinerary or cut down on unnecessary expenses? Small changes—like sharing hotel rooms, skipping the pricey dinner, or switching destinations—can make the weekend more affordable for everyone without compromising the fun.

You don’t have to disclose who brought up the concern. Just reframe it as wanting to make sure the weekend is inclusive and accessible for the whole group.

Offer Flexibility

If the full weekend or destination is out of reach, talk to your bridesmaid about joining for part of the celebration instead. Maybe she can’t fly out for four days, but she can drive in for one night. Perhaps she skips the spa day but meets everyone for dinner and dancing.

Let her know that showing up in any way—even if it’s just a FaceTime toast—is appreciated. Being flexible shows you value her presence over her wallet.

Be Honest About Your Expectations

As a bride, it’s okay to hope for a fun and meaningful celebration. But it’s also important to recognize that not everyone’s financial situation is the same. If a bridesmaid can’t participate in the way you envisioned, remind yourself that the heart of the bachelorette party is about connection—not the location or budget.

Communicate that your priority is having her in your life and by your side, not how much she can contribute to a weekend.

Find Other Ways to Celebrate Together

If a bridesmaid needs to skip the bachelorette entirely, that doesn’t mean the celebration ends. Consider planning a more low-key, local hangout—like a girls’ night in, a brunch date, or a mini spa day—that works with her budget and schedule.

It won’t replace the main event, but it will still give you a special memory together, and show that your friendship matters beyond wedding festivities.

Don’t Take It Personally

It’s easy to feel hurt when someone you care about can’t participate in an event that feels so important. But financial limitations are rarely about how much someone values you—it’s simply about what’s realistic for their life right now. Avoid interpreting it as a lack of love or support. Instead, focus on the ways your bridesmaid is showing up for you throughout your wedding journey.

Remember What Matters Most

At the end of the day, your wedding is about celebrating love—your love for your partner, and your love for the people who’ve supported you along the way. If one bridesmaid can’t swing a big bachelorette trip, that doesn’t diminish her role or the strength of your friendship.

Lead with kindness, be flexible where you can, and keep perspective on what the celebration is truly about.